I wandered in the "nondual" marketplace,
Among the countless awakened,
Who feel that all there is, is Consciousness,
And simply understanding this,
Is all that is required.
And while there is something to it,
On the face of things,
I found, upon lifting the facade,
An arid, cerebral affair,
Seeming to me, tragically misguided.
For though the mind lead me, truly,
To the Gates of Heaven,
There, having reached the end of its utility,
Having become blind, deaf, and mute,
It stepped aside, in Humility…
For only the Heart could enter there.
I fell, at that fatal juncture,
From Mind into Heart,
From concept into Feeling,
From understanding into Experience,
And Became…
What the Mind can only “think about”.
My "enquiry" was driven by Love,
Not an academic investigation,
Searching to reach a "conclusion",
Based on irrefutable logic,
Presented with unarguable certainty.
My desire was to Vanish… and Become.
To Vanish as the felt sense,
Of all I come to feel myself as being,
And Become, in "my" Vanishing,
That which I had Loved and Longed for.
What was it I Loved and Longed for?
At the time, only a vague "remembrance",
Of something... Wonderful,
But long forgotten in Ancient Memory,
A sense of myself, not as myself...
And yet... My Self.
A Feeling, not a concept,
A felt sense of, dare I say it...
Heaven, within, and Fulfillment,
In the most Unimaginable sense,
Of the Heart's Desire.
I "Felt" my way to my Essential Self,
Before ever "I" and the world appeared.
I "Felt" my way to Heaven,
Before manifestation ever was,
And the Suffering inherent in duality.
I came, through Mind, to that place,
Where I could not find myself,
But turning there, to the Heart,
Could Feel my Self... Alive,
As... Aliveness.
The thinking mind brought understanding,
Of the fact of my Formless Unlocatability,
But the Feeling Heart Experienced,
Beyond Understanding and Feeling,
What both Heart and Mind become…
What Is, before ever they were.
Among the countless awakened,
Who feel that all there is, is Consciousness,
And simply understanding this,
Is all that is required.
And while there is something to it,
On the face of things,
I found, upon lifting the facade,
An arid, cerebral affair,
Seeming to me, tragically misguided.
For though the mind lead me, truly,
To the Gates of Heaven,
There, having reached the end of its utility,
Having become blind, deaf, and mute,
It stepped aside, in Humility…
For only the Heart could enter there.
I fell, at that fatal juncture,
From Mind into Heart,
From concept into Feeling,
From understanding into Experience,
And Became…
What the Mind can only “think about”.
My "enquiry" was driven by Love,
Not an academic investigation,
Searching to reach a "conclusion",
Based on irrefutable logic,
Presented with unarguable certainty.
My desire was to Vanish… and Become.
To Vanish as the felt sense,
Of all I come to feel myself as being,
And Become, in "my" Vanishing,
That which I had Loved and Longed for.
What was it I Loved and Longed for?
At the time, only a vague "remembrance",
Of something... Wonderful,
But long forgotten in Ancient Memory,
A sense of myself, not as myself...
And yet... My Self.
A Feeling, not a concept,
A felt sense of, dare I say it...
Heaven, within, and Fulfillment,
In the most Unimaginable sense,
Of the Heart's Desire.
I "Felt" my way to my Essential Self,
Before ever "I" and the world appeared.
I "Felt" my way to Heaven,
Before manifestation ever was,
And the Suffering inherent in duality.
I came, through Mind, to that place,
Where I could not find myself,
But turning there, to the Heart,
Could Feel my Self... Alive,
As... Aliveness.
The thinking mind brought understanding,
Of the fact of my Formless Unlocatability,
But the Feeling Heart Experienced,
Beyond Understanding and Feeling,
What both Heart and Mind become…
What Is, before ever they were.
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