Saturday, September 28, 2013

Paul Hedderman - Self Is a Parasite

(Text is from talks by Paul Hedderman edited by James Saint Cloud.)

The room filled with people arriving to hear Paul Hedderman. He was introduced and his talk began.

“I was in the lobby of the hotel sitting by the fire last night.

A man sat down in the next chair. Said he was in town for a seminar about ‘self improvement.’ Ha, ha, ha! So I let him know what I thought of that.”
Hotel lobby, the night before.

The fire cracks and pops. Paul sips his tea. Thought-trains move through the station of his mind, offering trips to What’s-Not-Happening, off into past or future time. He simply watches them as they go through.

A man enters the room.

“Is this seat available?”
“Sure,” says Paul.
“My name is Hans. I’m here for a seminar. Self-improvement sort of thing.”
“But why do that? Ha, ha, ha!”
“What do you mean?”
“Self is the problem. Better just to let it go.”
“You go to seminars to become an improved self. But why do that? The idea of being a self is what the problem is.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Self is a parasite.”
“It is?”
“Sure. It's taken over. You’re seeing FROM it all day long.”
“I am?”
“We never entertain the idea of being outside the realm of self-centeredness, because it’s taken root in us and we are identified with it. So all we can do is therapize and socialize it, so it doesn’t flip out at the next picnic. We just hunker down in the chronic effects of self-centeredness. Failing to see the self as the parasite it is."
Hans stares at him.
"I heard a lot of concepts in earlier days about how to make things wonderful. But I heard them as a 'me.' Which neutered everything and turned it into more selfing.
The mind is obsessed with the idea of being a self. And it doesn’t recognize: That’s the dilemma. Your attention orbits around the planet Self all day, because the self provides the gravitational pull to all the thoughts, making them about YOU.
If you realized they weren’t about the real you, they could simply come and go. Your attention would be freed up from the slavery of selfing and would attend to the conscious contact; there would be a recognition in and of itself. Traveling lighter — not by any procedures or practice, but by recognition of what’s so.
A thought is just a thought; but it changes dramatically when it becomes MY thought. The interpretation of the thought as being MINE is slapped on it. That's what the self does.
The reason I’m hooked on the narrative in my head is because I think it’s about me. By freeing up some of the attention from the selfing we become aware of the conscious contact itself. The enslavement can be over by simply entertaining you’re not the selfing. If you recognize you’re not the self, you will lose interest in all its activities.
You say you want to be ‘awake.’ But while you are adsorbed in the story of self you will be unconscious to the fact that you are ALREADY AWAKE. Then you may have the curse of thinking you want to BECOME awake. Reinforcing the idea that you are not awake.
The head is playing God. And it’s already beat you, since now it’s got you thinking you’re not awake. It’s going to play with that for years.
There’s no escaping WHAT’S SO. You can SENSE living or else you can THINK about it. That’s the choice.
This is not about acquiring knowledge. It’s about waking up to the essence of what we call living. If you identify as SELF, you’re going to inhabit the realm of WHAT'S NOT HAPPENING. The future and the past.
You have tons of old ideas about you. Unless you let go of these you are traveling very heavy.
You’re meant to be fluid. A very light boat that can navigate and handle different kinds of weather. You’re just an old tanker now. Each moment big waves coming in. You need relief.
But where do you go for that release? To your head! Which is the problem. The relief it offers is part of the bondage to self. We go to the problem asking for advice!
Realize you’re not in the problem. Never have been. That’s the solution. The lie is that you were 'in self.' But you never were. Your attention was hijacked, that’s all."
“Selfing?" says Hans, "Exactly what is that?”
“Obsessing with thoughts about yourself; making up stories about the feelings you’re having or not having. Attention glued to the screen of self. It can be released, for attention to return to the conscious contact, each moment’s raw pure experience.
Most of our time is spent emphasizing what’s-not-happening over what-is-happening. We’re using what IS happening to think about what’s NOT happening and to expectantly feel about what MAY happen.
All the while there is What-Is-Happening. Why not stay there? No longer as the wave but as the whole ocean that you truly ARE."
Hans looks away into the fire. "Nothing to strive for or attain? Perhaps if I map it out . . ."
"You don’t need a map to go to the truth. You are the truth! Consciousness is inherently available to us. That’s it. That’s the entrance way. But there’s no YOU that’s going through the door, because there is no you. The idea of being a you creates the idea of a door to the truth; that it’s always outside of your contact. The idea that you might suddenly meet up with the truth. No! You are that truth. You are consciousness, right now.
Truth is available at all times, but it’s not available to what you’re not. What you’re not will never access it, it’s impossible.
Your head believes you’re what you’re not, and causes you to be unconscious of the consciousness. Then the curse of 'spiritual seeking' takes you on a journey to become conscious of consciousness. How’s that going to work?
The true happening is awareness; and that’s always happening. The relief you are seeking is always available. You don’t have to go into therapy, work on your fears and phobias, no.
When you wake from the dream there’s an instant recognition: It’s a dream-tiger. The dream is what’s not happening.
There is no reason for a YOU to appear now. It only has to do with what’s not happening. All your anxieties are a product of what’s not happening. The you that is not.
You don’t get rid of the self. Because it was never there. You sense the appearance of a mental construct called selfing, but it was never there. There is no self. No reason to get rid of it. That’s the solution.
Whatever the mind presents, just rest in that. Don’t react. Then you’ll have immunity to what the mind presents. Your reactions will change and life will be totally different. Because it’s your reaction that gives self its meaning.
Life is 'what’s happening.' But when it’s a reaction, it’s 'what’s happening to me.'"
"It's all a bit new to me, you know," Hans gets up to go. "If you'll excuse me, I must be up early for my seminar. 'An Invitation to What Is SO,' by a chap named Hedderman."
"Ha, ha, ha. Just remember, you don't improve the self. You simply let it go. Just entertain the idea you’re not the self you think you are."

Thursday, September 26, 2013

Seng-ts’an - Hsin Hsin Ming

Hsin Hsin Ming (excerpt)


If the eye never sleeps,
all dreams will naturally cease.
If the mind makes no discriminations,
the ten thousand things
are as they are, of single essence.
To understand the mystery of this One-essence
is to be released from all entanglements.
When all things are seen equally
the timeless Self-essence is reached.
No comparisons or analogies are possible
in this causeless, relationless state.

Consider movement stationary
and the stationary in motion:
both movement and rest disappear.
When such dualities cease to exist
Oneness itself cannot exist.
To this ultimate finality
no law or description applies.

Wednesday, September 25, 2013

Maku Mark Frank - Crossing the Stream

I set out to cross the stream once long ago.
Or maybe it was yesterday.
Funny, time can be like that.
I remember gazing at the other side—
The grassy lowlands beckoning,
The cool, green forest foothills
Rising gently into snowcapped glory ...
I remember wondering of the sights up there—
Above the clouds,
Beyond all worldly cares.
Oh, how I longed to tread that path unseen!
Sloping toward sunlit transcendence ...
But first I had to cross that stream.

I found a raft of four logs lashed together,
Hidden in the reeds there, half submerged.
And though the vessel’s simple nature had me wondering,
That I could see the other side left me assured.
And so I poled my humble raft into deep waters
With thoughts already soaring high above.
And it was clear that I’d gone way too far to turn back
By the time I felt the current’s tug.

Down, down, down the river took me
Till I’d have gladly kissed the ground on either side,
Past sleeping beachside towns and sweeping bayous,
And out into the ocean deep and wide.
Then just as my raft’s lashings were unraveling
And I was wondering what worse fate I could have met
The wind and waves began to rise up
And the sun began to set.

There was a time I thought myself much stronger
With ample will and strength in store,
But down, down, down those waters pulled me
Till I could fight their power no more.
And as I sank into the blackness
I could think of nothing but that shore
From which I’d gazed up at those snowfields
Feeling in need of something more.

And so I died to all I’d once been.
I died as well to all my dreams.
And as I settled on the ocean floor,
I died to every separate thing.
For one last breath I viewed existence,
For one last cold and watery sigh –
Upon the bottom of the ocean
Immersed within a star-filled sky…

There was a time when crossing to the other side
Still seemed as real as each new breath,
Way back when sun and moon, and stream and tide
Were as distinct as life and death,
Before that death to all illusion
There upon the ocean floor,
Before realizing that just this moment

Is the long sought after other shore.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj - ‘I am’ Meditation

Focused ‘I am’ Meditation Based on the teachings of Shri Nisargadatta Maharaj
Compiled by Pradeep Apte

    The ‘I am’ came first, it’s ever present, ever available, refuse all thoughts except ‘I am’, stay there Just stay put firmly and establish yourself in the ‘I am’, reject all that does not go with ‘I am’
    Consistently and with perseverance separate the ‘I am’ from ‘this’ or ‘that’, just keep in mind the feeling ‘I am’
    Only the ‘I am’ is certain, it’s impersonal, all knowledge stems from it, it’s the root, hold on to it and let all else go
    You are sure of the ‘I am’, it’s the totality of being, remember ‘I am’ and it’s enough to heal your mind and take you beyond
    The ‘I am’ is, it’s ever fresh, all else is inference, when the ‘I am’ goes all that remains is the Absolute
    Give all you attention to the ‘I am’, which is timeless presence, the ‘I am’ applies to all, come back to it repeatedly
    Hang to the ‘I am’ and go beyond it, without the ‘I am’ you are at peace and happy
    Hold on to the ‘I am’ to the exclusion of everything else, the ‘I am’ in movement creates the world, the ‘I am’ at peace becomes the Absolute
    Immortality is freedom from the feeling ‘I am’, to have that freedom remain in the sense ‘I am’, its simple, its crude, yet it works!
    The ‘I am’ is unreal and real, unreal when identified with body, real when wordless and used to go beyond
    The ‘I am’ has brought you in, the ‘I am’ will take you out, the ‘I am’ is the door, stay at it! It’s open!
    You have to be there before you can say ‘I am’, the ‘I am’ is the root of all appearance
    The ‘I am’ is the permanent link in the succession of events called life, be at the link ‘I am’ only and go beyond it
    The ‘I am’ is the sum total of all that you perceive, it’s time-bound, the ‘I am’ itself is an illusion, you are not the 
‘I am’ you are prior to it
    The ‘I am’ is your greatest foe and greatest friend, foe when binding to the illusion as body, friend when taking out of the illusion as body
    The beginning and the end of knowledge is the ‘I am’, be attentive to the ‘I am’, once you understand it, you are apart from it
    You must meditate on the ‘I am’ without holding on to the body-mind, the ‘I am’ is the first ignorance, persist on it and you will go beyond it
    Your Guru, your God, is the ‘I am’, with its coming came duality and all activity, stay on the ‘I am’, you are before the ‘I am’ appeared
    The ‘I am’ concept is the last out post of the illusion, hold on to it, stabilize in the ‘I am’, then you are no more and individual
    Without doing anything you have the knowledge ‘I am’, it has come spontaneously and unwillingly on you, stay there and put an ax to the ‘I am’
    Your only capital is the ‘I am’, it’s the only tool you can use to solve the riddle of life, the ‘I am’ is in all and movement inherent in it
    Only be the ‘I am’, just be, the ‘I am’ has appeared on your homogenous state, the one free of the ‘I am’ is liberated, you are prior to the ‘I am’
    Worship the indwelling ‘I am’ in you, it is the ‘I am’ that is born, it is the ‘I am’ that will die, you are not that ‘I am’
    Remain focused on the ‘I am’ till it goes into oblivion, then the eternal is, Absolute is, Parabrahman is
    The knowledge ‘I am’ is the birth principle, investigate it and you’ll finally stabilize in the Absolute Parabrahman
    All knowledge including the ‘I am’ is formless, throw out the ‘I am’ and stay put in quietude
    Prior to birth where was the ‘I am’? Don’t contaminate the 
‘I am’ with the body idea, I as the Absolute am not the ‘I am’
    In the absence of ‘I am’ nothing is required, the ‘I am’ will go with the body, what remains is the Absolute
    You must not only have the conviction that ‘I am’ but also that you are free from the ‘I am’
    Remember the knowledge ‘I am’ only and give up the rest, staying in the ‘I am’ you would realize that it is unreal
    Understand that the knowledge ‘I am’ has dawned on you and all are its manifestations, in this understanding you realize you are not the ‘I am’
    When this concept ‘I am’ departs there would be no memory left that ‘I was’ and ‘I had’ those experiences, the very memory will be erased
    With the arrival of the primary concept ‘I am’, time began, with its departure time would end; you the Absolute are not the primary concept ‘I am
    When you know both the ‘I am’ and the ‘I am not’ then you are the Absolute which transcends both knowingness and no-knowingness
    Appearance and disappearance, birth and death these are qualities of ‘I am’, they do not belong to you, the Absolute
    Out of the nothingness, the ‘I am’ or beingness has come, there is no individual, the knowledge ‘I am’- not the individual – has to go back to its source
    By meditating on the knowledge ‘I am’ it gradually settles down at its source and disappears, then, you are the Absolute
    Go on to know the ‘I am’ without words, you must be that and not deviate from it for even a moment, and then it would disappear
    With the dropping off of the primary experience ‘I am’ all experiences would vanish and only the Absolute remains
    On your true state has arisen this subtle principle ‘I am’, which is the cause of all mischief, no ‘I am’, and no question of mischief
    Whatever you try to become that is not you, before even the words ‘I am’ were said, that is you
    The root habit is the ‘I am’ and it has arisen from the domain five elements and three qualities which are unreal
    Abide in the knowledge ‘I am’ without identifying with the body, how did you function before the arrival of the knowledge 
‘I am’?
    The state of being, that is the message ‘I am’, without words, is common to all, change begins only with the mind-flow
    The belief in the ‘I am’ to be something as a body, as an individual is the cause of all fear, in the absence of the 
‘I am’, who is to fear what?
    Try to stabilize in the primary concept ‘I am’ in order to lose that and be free from all other concepts, in understating the unreality of the ‘I am’ you are totally free
    Sitting quietly, being one with the knowledge ‘I am’, you would lose all concern with the world, then the ‘I am’ would also go, leaving you as the Absolute
    Putting aside everything, stabilize in the ‘I am’ - as you continue with this practice – in the process you will transcend the ‘I am’
    The very core of this consciousness is the quality ‘I am’, there is no personality or individual there, reside there and transcend it
    Worship the knowledge ‘I am’ as God, as your Guru, the message ‘I am’ is there, the mind-flow is there, stay in the 
‘I am’ realize you are neither
    Presently you are sustaining the memory ‘I am’, you are not that ‘I am’, you are the Absolute prior to that ‘I am’
    You feel the ‘I am’ due to the five elements and three qualities, they gone the ‘I am’ goes but you are still there
    Keep focused on the ‘I am’ till you become a witness to it, then you stand apart, you have reached the highest
    This knowledge ‘I am’ has come out of the state prior to it and now is the cause of all suffering, before the ‘I am’ came you were happy, so revert
    When you remain in the ‘I am’ you will realize everything else is useless, and then you are Parabrahman, the Absolute
    The One who abides in that principle by which he knows ‘I am’ knows all and does not require anything
    Just sit and know that ‘you are’, the ‘I am’ without words, nothing else has to be done; shortly you will arrive to your natural Absolute state
    Erroneously you have handed over this knowledge ‘I am’ to the body thereby reduced the limitless to the limited; hence you are afraid of dying
    You have to realize that you are not the body or the knowledge ‘I am’, you as the Absolute are neither, nor do you require them
    Inquire into the validity of the fundamental concept of you individuality the ‘I am’ and it will disappear, then you are Parabrahman, the Absolute
    The essential thing to be convinced about is that the original concept ‘I am’ is false, only accept that which is conducive to this development
    Before you occurred to yourself as ‘I am’ you were the highest - Parabrahman – now, until the impurity of ‘I am the body’ goes stay put in the ‘I am’ quietude
    Your fall started with the appearance of ‘I am’, then you blundered by embracing the body as ‘I am’, all that gathered thereafter is unreal
    This is no joke, but you can become Parabrahman right now! You are Parabrahman right now! Just focus your attention on the ‘I am’
    Who has the knowledge ‘I am’? Somebody in you knows the knowledge ‘I am’, ‘you are’, who is it?
    Who can know the illusory state ‘I am’? Only a non-illusory state can do so, it’s the Awareness, the Parabrahman, or the Absolute
    The primary concept ‘I am’ is dishonest, a cheat, it has deceived you, into believing what is not, sharply focus on the 
‘I am’ and it’ll disappear
    Finally you have to transcend the ‘I am’ to enter the concept-free Parabrahman state, where you do not even know you are!
    The Absolute or the Parabrahman is prior to the ‘I am’, it’s the unborn state, so how can it have the knowledge ‘I am’?
    Presently whatever you know is the ‘I am’ which is a product of the five elements, three qualities or the food body, but you are none of these
    One who has realized the knowledge ‘I am’ which means transcending it as well, for him there is no birth or death nor any karma
    The primary illusion is only this knowingness ‘I am’; it is liberation when the knowingness is transformed to nonknowingness
    You are even before even you could say the words ‘I am’, witnessing happens to the state prior to your saying the words 
‘I am’
    When the body dies the ‘I am’ goes into oblivion, only the Absolute remains, stay put there, nothing happens to you the Absolute
    From non-being to being, how is it known? It’s by the knowledge ‘I am’, stay there in the ‘I am’, then you’ll revert from being to non-being
    Right now, here, you are the Absolute, the Parabrahman, very firmly hold on to the ‘I am’, ever abide in it and it’ll dissolve, then you are as you are
    On the state of non-beingness, beingness as the ‘I am’ has occurred, who that is not important, the ‘I am’ is important, stay there
    First came the ‘aham’ as ‘I am’, then ‘aham-akar’ (identification with body, ego), now revert back to ‘aham’, dwelling there realize ‘ahambrahmasmi’
    You are neither the ‘I am’ nor the activities carried out by the beingness, you as the Absolute are none of these
    With the transcendence of the knowledge ‘I am’, the Absolute prevails. The state is called Parabrahman, while the knowledge 
‘I am’ is Brahman
    How were you prior to the message ‘I am’? In the absence of the message ‘I am’ only my eternal Absolute state prevails
    Who would have witnessed the message ‘I am’, if your prior state of non-beingness were not there?
    A true devotee, by abiding in the knowledge ‘I am’, transcends the experience of death and attains immortality
    Hold on to this knowingness ‘I am’ without words and every secret of your existence would be revealed to you
    What is it in you that understands this knowledge ‘I am’ without a name, title or word? Subside in that innermost center and witness the knowledge ‘I am’
    Totally accept the knowledge ‘I am’ as oneself and with full conviction and faith and firmly believe in the dictum ‘I am that by which I know I am’
    Reality prevails prior to the knowledge ‘I am’; you must stay put at the source of your creation, at the beginning of the knowledge ‘I am’
    When one is established in the final free Absolute state, the knowledge ‘I am’ becomes ‘non-knowledge’
    The first witnessing is that of ‘I am’, the primary prerequisite for all further witnessing, but to whom is the first witnessing of ‘I am’ occurring?
    The borderline of ‘I am’ (beingness) and ‘I am not’ (non-beingness} is the precise location where the intellect subsides, its’ the ‘maha-yoga’ state, be there
    Recognize the Atman by understanding the knowledge ‘I am’, the Atma-jnana, which is all pervading, limitless and infinite
    To abide in the knowledge ‘I am’ is one’s true religion, give the highest honor due to it, doing so you will not undergo suffering or death
    Who says ‘I was not’ and ‘I would not be’ like the present 
‘I am’? He is the one who was, is, and would be forever
    When you say ‘I was not prior to conception’ you actually mean not like the present ‘I am’, but the one to discern the absence of the present ‘I am’ was there
    Catch hold of the knowledge ‘I am’ in meditation and the realization would occur that ‘I’ the Absolute am not the ‘guna’ ‘I am’
    Do nothing but stay in the knowledge ‘I am’ – the ‘moolmaya’ – the primary illusion, and then it will release its stranglehold on you and get lost
    In deep meditation, infused only with the knowledge ‘I am’, it would be intuitively revealed to you as to how this ‘I amness’ came to be
    The knowledge ‘I am’ means consciousness, God, Guru, Ishwara, but you the Absolute are none of these
    You have to understand that the ‘I am’ is even before the arising of any words, thoughts or feelings
    The indwelling principle ‘I am’ is common to all and has no attributes; it is the principle of the whole functioning
    Identify yourself with the highest principle in you which is the knowledge ‘I am’ This will elevate you to the status of ‘Brihaspati’ – the guru of gods
    This knowingness ‘I am’ that came spontaneously and you felt gradually is the ignorant-child-principle, the ‘Balkrishna’ state
    This ‘I am’ or Balkrishna state has great potential. Here ‘Bal’ means the child food body and ‘Krishna’ means ‘nonknowing’
    To do away with body-mind sense or identity, imbibe or dwell in the ‘I am’, later the ‘I am’ would merge in the ultimate nature
    The highest type of rest is when ‘I am’ and ‘I am not’ both are forgotten. It is called ‘Param Vishranti’, which means ultimately forget everything in the end
    Having acquired and understood the knowledge ‘I am’ stay there in seclusion and don’t wander around here and there
    Once you stabilize in the ‘I am’ you will realize that it is not the eternal state. But you are eternal and ancient
    The sequence is ‘I am’- the witness – to the whole manifestation, it occurs simultaneously. The ‘I am’ subsiding, what remains? You are ‘That’
    What I say is simple, when the ‘I am’ arises, everything appears, when ‘I am’ subsides everything disappears
    You want me to say something about the post-‘I am’- manifestation, while I am driving you to the pre-‘I am’- Absolute
    I am not telling you what the real is, because words negate that. Whatever I am telling you is not the truth because it has come from the ‘I am’
    I take you to the source ‘I am’ again and again, on reaching and stabilizing there you realize there is no ‘I am’!
    There is no explanation how this seed, this consciousness or the knowledge ‘I am’ has arisen. But once come it keeps humming through the ‘gunas’
    You must know how this ‘I am’ came about as it is the only thing by which you can unravel the whole mystery
    On your pure Absoluteness which is without form or shape, came this knowledge ‘I am’, which is also without shape and form
    This knowledge ‘I am’ has spontaneously ‘appeared’ on your Absolute state, therefore it is an illusion
    This knowledge ‘I am’, the ‘sattva’ cannot tolerate itself, so it needs the ‘rajas’(doing) and ‘tamas’(claiming doership) for sustenance
    The only ‘sadhana’ (practice) is to think: I am not the body, but I am the formless, nameless knowledge ‘I am’ indwelling in this body
    When you abide for a sufficiently long time in the ‘I am’, the knowledge ‘I am’ itself will make everything clear to you. No external knowledge will be necessary
    Conviction is the only technique and the only initiation by the guru is: you are not the body but only the ‘I am’ without words
    When you clearly see that it is the ‘I am’ that is born, you stand apart from it as the unborn
    Once the ‘I am’ goes what remains is the Original which is unconditioned, without attributes or identity, it is called ‘Parabrahma, or the Absolute
    The absence of ‘I am’ is not experienced by ‘someone’; it has to be understood in a manner as the experiencer and experience are one
    The knowledge ‘I am’ that appeared in childhood is a cheat as it made you believe the illusion to be true
    This knowledge ‘I am’ has dawned on you, thereafter witnessing began. That ‘One’ to whom the witnessing takes place is separate from the witnessed
    Meditation is this knowledge ‘I am’, this consciousness, meditating on itself and unfolding its own meaning
    When you meditate on the knowledge ‘I am’, how can there be any questions at this point? As it is the beginning of knowledge
    Use name, form and design only for worldly activities; otherwise just hold on to the knowledge ‘I am’ without body sense – beyond name, form or design
    There are no techniques except the technique that ‘I am’ the firm conviction that ‘I am’ means ‘I am’ only
    This conviction can be strengthened by meditation and meditation means when the knowledge ‘I am’ remains in that knowledge
    The greatest miracle is that you got the news ‘I am’, it’s self-evident. Prior to knowing that ‘you are’ what knowledge did you have?
    Meditation means to have an objective or hold something, you are that something. Just being the being ‘I am’
    It is not with the body identification that you should sit for meditation. It is the knowledge ‘I am’ that is meditating on itself
    When this ‘I am’ or conscious presence merges in itself and disappears the state of ‘Samadhi’ ensues
    In the womb the knowledge ‘I am’ is in a dormant condition. It is the birth principle which contains everything
    The birth principle is ‘Turiya’ (the fourth state) which means where the consciousness is
    The experience that ‘I am’ or you exist is ‘Turiya’. One who knows ‘Turiya’ is ‘Turiyatita’ (beyond the fourth state), which is my state
    ‘Turiya’ or ‘I am’ is within the consciousness which is the product of five elements
    In order to stabilize in the ‘I am’ or ‘Turiya’ you must understand this birth principle
    ‘Turiya’ or ‘I am’ is always described as the witness state that sees through the waking, dreaming and sleeping. And ‘Turiyatita’ is even beyond that
    In the absence of the basic concept ‘I am’, there is no thought, no awareness, and no consciousness of one’s existence
    Together with the body and the indwelling principle ‘I am’ everything is. Prior to that what was there?
    Hang on to the ‘I am’ which is your only capital, meditate on it, and let that unfold all the knowledge that has to come
    You should identify yourself only with this indwelling knowledge ‘I am’. That is all
    Sit for meditation by identifying with the ‘I am’, dwell only on the ‘I am’- not merely the words ‘I am’
    Forget all about physical disciplines in this connection and just be with that knowledge ‘I am’
    Do you require any special effort to know that ‘you are’? The ‘I am’ without words itself is God
    You must fulfill the vow that I am not the body but the indwelling principle ‘I am’ only
    Once you become the ‘I am’ it will reveal all the knowledge and you need not go to anybody
    The primary concept ‘I am’ appears spontaneously and is the source of all concepts, so everything is mental entertainment
    This memory ‘I am’ is neither true nor false, it is without these two attributes. That memory of beingness only appears to exist
    The ‘I am’ itself is the world, go to the source and find out how it appeared and when
    The conviction that the ‘I am’ and the world never existed can happen only to ‘Parabrahman’ (The Absolute)
    To stabilize in the ‘I am’ which has no name and form is itself liberation
    The knowledge that is prior to thought – ‘I am’ – is covered by a human body which food with the vital breath and knowledge of the Self (Prana and Jnana)
    Once you reach the state of ‘I am’ and are aware of that only you will have transcended all the tendencies (‘Vasanas’)
    Be one with the Self, the ‘I am’, if necessary discard the words ‘I am’, even without them you know ‘you are’
    The ‘I am’ is the awareness before thoughts it cannot be put into words; you have to ‘just be’
    The ‘I am’ in you came from the ‘I am’ in your parents but only then could they be called parents!
    The ‘I am’ is the divinity in you and cause of the sacred repetition (‘Japa’) in you breath of ‘So Hum’ (I am ‘That’)
    The Absolute doesn’t know that ‘It is’, only when the knowledge ‘I am’ spontaneously appeared it knew ‘It is’
    Become initiated into the understanding of what I am expounding to you; I am telling about the seed of ‘Brahman’ or 
‘I am’ that I am planting in you
    That ‘Brahman’ or ‘I am’ state alone embraces everything and is all the manifestation. You have to forget everything and merge with ‘Brahman’
    Whatever is created is created by the knowledge ‘I am’, there is no other path, only this conviction. This is it! The name and body arise from the ‘I am’
    Abiding in the ‘I am’ (which is God) you wouldn’t want to leave it, and then it wouldn’t leave you!
    The ‘I am’ is there even without your saying so. Once you understand the ‘I am’, there is nothing further to understand
    When you are established in the ‘I am’ there are no thoughts or words, you are everything and everything is you; later even that goes
    The ‘I am’ is without ego, you can become its watcher only by getting established in it
    Watching happens to the Absolute with the appearance of 
‘I am’, only then it knows that ‘it is’
    Waking, dreaming and deep sleep states pertain only to the 
‘I am’, you are above these
    When you go deep inside, nothing is there, no ‘I am’; the 
‘I am’ merges in the Absolute
    Understand this ‘I am’ business and stand apart from it, transcend it. Just be
    The story of all of us begins with the ‘I am’, it is the starting point of both misery and happiness
    Prior to the appearance of form in the womb, the food stuffs take the form ‘I am’ and that appears in nine months
    Stabilize in the ‘Bindu’ (Point) ‘I am’ and transcend it. ‘Bindu’ means without duality (Bin=without, Du=two)
    It is the ‘I am’ that investigates the ‘I am’, disposes it off and stabilizes in Eternity
    The knowledge ‘I am’ is God, if presently you are unable to understand it then just worship it
    If you like take the ‘I am’ as your ‘prarabdha’ (destiny), become one with it, then you can transcend it
    Along with the knowledge ‘I am’ appears the space and world. When the knowledge ‘I am’ sets the world is liquidated
    Hammer it into yourself that the ‘I am’ or ‘beingness’ is the parent of the entire manifestation, then the ‘I am’ itself will help you stabilize in the ‘I am’
    The ‘I am’ is observed by the Absolute, it has no senses or eyes, witnessing just happens
    I am introducing you to your ‘I am’, the first stage is to meditate on the ‘I am’ and stabilize in it
    Carry the conviction in yourself that the knowledge ‘I am’ within you is God
    The One who meditates on the knowledge ‘I am’, everything in the realm of Consciousness becomes clear to him
    Go anywhere but never forget that the knowledge ‘I am’ is God
    Day by day by constant meditation this conviction will grow
    Don’t bother about anything, just continue abiding in the ‘I am’, a moment will come when it will be pleased and reveal all the secrets
    The trap of birth and death is because of the ‘I am’, dwell on it, realize it and transcend it
    Get established in the ‘I am’ without words, the ‘Paravani’, but you the Absolute are not that Your true identity – The Absolute – is prior to the ‘I am’. How can you provide a uniform to it?
    My Guru taught me what ‘I am’, I pondered only on that. My original state is to be in that state where there is no ‘I am’
    The ‘I am’ happened and the world was cooked up. Prior to that you did not have the message ‘I am’, you existed, but you did not know
    In the infinite state, the ‘I am’ state is temporary; don’t give up your true standpoint, otherwise you will be fooled
    Catch hold of the ‘I am’ and all obstacles will evaporate, you will be beyond the realm of body-mind
    All questions exist because the ‘I am’ is there, the ‘I am’ disappearing no questions will arise
    Understand the ‘I am’, transcend it and conclude that ‘beingness’, the world and Brahman are unreal
    The ‘So Hum’ japa (recitation) is incessantly going on in your pulse indicating ‘I am’; get in tune with it by recitation
    The recitation of ‘So Hum’, indicating ‘I am’, must be for a very long time, it is prior to words
    The ‘I am’ is the only God to be pleased and if pleased it will lead you to the source
    A ‘Jnani’ is one who has come to a conclusion about the raw material ‘I am’ and stands apart from it
    That soundless sound, the humming ‘I am’ is a reminder that you are God. To understand and realize it meditate on it
    You are in the ‘I am’ without any effort, so be there. Don’t try to interpret the ‘I am’
    The ‘I am’ in body form can reach the highest state, if you accept it and dwell there you escape birth and death
    The ‘I am’ is an advertisement of the Absolute, an illusion, temporary, the one who knows this knows the eternal principle. In the womb the ‘I am’ is dormant, at three years it arises spontaneously; it climaxes at middle age and diminishes in old age and finally it disappears
    Remember this, if you want to remember me or this visit here, remember the knowledge ‘I am’
    The body identity cannot get this knowledge, the knowledge 
‘I am’ must get this knowledge; when knowledge abides in knowledge there is transcendence of knowledge
    This ‘I am’ whenever enjoyed beyond the body is your destiny, dwell in it and itself it will tell you its own story
    When you dwell in destiny as ‘I am’, you realize that it is not your death, but the disappearance of ‘I amness’
    Understand the ‘I am’, transcend it and realize the Absolute

    In such a simplified way nobody has expounded this profound teaching

Monday, September 23, 2013

Huang Po - A jewel beyond all price

Bodhidharma Sat Facing the Wall (stone carved painting)

Though others may talk of the Way of the Bhuddas as something to be reached by various pious practices and by sutra study, you must have nothing to do with such ideas. A perception, sudden as blinking, that subject and object are one, will lead to a deeply mysterious wordless understanding; and by this understanding will you awake to the truth of Zen. When you happen upon someone who has no understanding, you must claim to know nothing. He may he delighted by his discovery of some "way to Enlightenment"; yet if you allow yourselves to be persuaded by him, you will experience no delight at all, but suffer both sorrow and disappointment. What have such thoughts as his to do with the study of Zen? Even if you do obtain from him some trifling "method," it will only be a thought-constructed dharma having nothing to do with Zen. Thus, Bodhidharma sat rapt in meditation before a wall; he did not seek to lead people into having opinions. Therefore it is written: "To put out of the mind even the principle from which action springs is the true teaching of the Buddhas, while dualism belongs to the sphere of the demons." Your true nature is something never lost to you even in moments of delusion, nor is it gained at the moment of Enlightenment. It is the Nature of the Bhutatathata. In it is neither delusion nor right understanding. It fills the Void everywhere and is intrinsically of the substance of the One Mind. How, then, can your mind-created objects exist outside of the Void? The Void is fundamentally without spacial dimensions, passions, activities,delusions, or right understanding. You must clearly understand that in it there are no things, no men, no Buddhas; for this Void contains not the smallest hairsbreadth of anything that can be viewed spacially; it depends on nothing and is attached to nothing. It is all-pervading, spotless beauty;it is the self-existent and uncreated Absolute. Then how can it ever be a matter for discussion that the real Buddha has no mouth and preaches no dharma, or that real hearing requires no ears, for who could hear it? Ah,it is a jewel beyond all price! 

This  passage is from "The Zen Teachings of Huang Po," ed John Blofeld.

Mooji - It's Nothing, Nothing, Nothing!

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Chuck Surface - The Middle of Nowhere

There is no rudder here, to guide,
No sail to catch the wind,
No stars to guide the way,
No land toward which to dream.

Where am I?
Where have I come from?
Where am I going?
What… is… this?

What can such a one,
Knowing nothing of anything,
Say to those drifting by,
In the way of “pointing”.

How is it that Bliss fills the Heart,
Of one so lost, knowing nothing of anything,
Drifting wide-eyed in Wonder,
An Idiot… not a sage?

And how is it possible that some,
“Catch” this Bliss from merely passing by,
Through wordless Grace alone,
No breath of guidance offered.
For Wisdom, not present,
Cannot be imparted,
Nor a way with certitude pointed,
By such an Idiot, adrift, Unknowing.

Love requires…
Only one's Presence.

My comfort, as they vanish,
Where Endless Sky meets Endless Sea,
Is that I am not alone in this Vastness,
Here… in Endless Wonder.

For the Bliss that inhabits this Heart,
Is born not of knowledge and certitude,
But from the Heart of The Great Mystery.

This Bliss is born of Endless Wonder,
Of rudderless boats,
And those Beautiful Beings…

Lost, and Found,
In the Middle of Nowhere.

H o m e.

miriam louisa - if there’s no ‘there’ out there…

 source unknown

if there’s no ‘there’ out there…

I keep on checking
but I always fail to find
a ‘within’ or ‘out there’
apart from thoughts in mind

so how can I ‘go within’
to ‘nurture’ the Immeasurable
or ‘cultivate’ it in the world
when ‘world’ and ‘me’ are inseparable?

if there’s no ‘there’ out there
(and this isn’t hard to see)
the buck stops right here
in this matrix called ‘me’

with nowhere to go
and nowhere to hide
no inner, outer, higher or lower
the heart can open wide

can kiss each wondrous moment
with a love that can’t be taught
the only way you’ll stop it
is to entertain a thought