image Benoit Courti
“I suppose the most radical part of my teaching at present is that love is not a feeling. Everybody suffers from love, or the fear of it, or the lack of it. Why? Why is love so universally and inevitably heart-breaking, whether it be through the end of a love affair, the death of a loved one or being locked in with the habitual casualness or grim indifference of a partner? The answer is because we’ve been taught and conditioned by the world to believe that love is a feeling.
Love is not a feeling; it’s a sensation. Drinking water when you’re thirsty is a sensation, not a feeling. Being in nature or swimming in the sea is a sensation, not a feeling. Lying down when you’re tired is sensational, not a feeling, although you may say it feels good. Feeling is an emotional interpretation of experience and these sensations don’t need interpretation; they are just good or right. Making physical love rightly is a sensation, not a feeling. So is the love of God. The same goes for joy and beauty; both are sensational.
But in our ignorance we emotionalise joy, beauty and love. We make feelings of them, personal interpretations based on our old emotions. We put our personal past on the present with the result that joy, beauty and love don’t seem to last. But it’s our emotional substitutes that don’t last and we become bored, discontented and unhappy again. The sensation or knowledge of joy, beauty and love is of course still there but it’s overwhelmed by these coarser feelings.
Feelings are constantly changing. None is dependable for long. You can love someone intensely today, and tomorrow or next month not feel a thing. Except perhaps for the feeling of doubt or depression that what was so beautiful could change so quickly.
Feelings, even the best of them, turn to negativity – disappointment, anger, discontent, resentment, jealousy, guilt, etc. A good feeling starts off being elevating, exciting, like taking a drug substance, alcohol or having sex. But what goes up must come down and feelings are no exception. So in a couple of hours or days the down side starts and you perhaps wonder why you feel moody, depressed, suicidal or just plain unhappy. You’re paying the piper for yesterday’s music. And between the upside and the downside is the no-man’s and no-woman’s land of boredom, indifference, inertia, weariness and pointlessness.
Okay, so you don’t have drugs, alcohol and sex but you love someone, as a feeling. Then it won’t be long before you’ll be experiencing one or more of the painful feelings I’ve mentioned above – and thinking it’s natural! Wait and see. Even in every day living you’re continually interpreting experience via your emotions instead of being the experience direct. “This is good, that’s bad,” your feelings swing subtly to and fro all day long obscuring the reality, the sensational knowledge or gnosis that it’s not bad at all; it’s simply life as it is.
All feelings are false and deceptive. […] Enlightenment is to be emptied (not empty) of feelings and thus at one with the pure sensation of divine being. And that pretty well sums up the whole spiritual process. But the spiritual process is so little understood that people don’t realise their feelings are personal and false and have been misleading them all their life. If that’s not true, why is humanity still unenlightened and basically unhappy after all this time – when enlightenment is the completely natural, sensational state of being every moment?
By disidentifying with your feelings you break your attachment to them. When that is done sufficiently you’re back at the beginning, in pure sensation or unconditioned knowledge. You’ve been beating your head against the wall to get some feelings and all you’ve got to do is break the habit and get used to living anew without pain and conflict. But that’s a mighty realisation, and a mighty simple one which few are going to accept – they’ll be too busy defending their feelings! So, I guess I’ll still be demonstrating this the day I die.”
