Ready, vigilant and alive, you are there—at the Gate.
Then comes the guide who had crossed before. She takes your hand
or slaps your face, depending on what you need, and guides you
through the Gate.
You turn back, and see that there is no Gate, there is no crossing,
there is no you.
And there never was.
ARE YOU READY?
Crossing the Gateless Gate—Are You Ready?
by Elena Nezhinsky
When I was at The Gate, I had no patience left for any more search.
I was burning for truth.
That night somebody guided me to see that for all this time, for years
and years, who was searching for whatever goal, holding whatever intention, was an imaginary self.
Years in silent retreats, sitting day after day, staring inside, purifying the mind.
Needed at the time, but not anymore.
The search that drove half of my life was suddenly suffocating me.
I was ready to cross, to step through, but I didn’t know where this path led.
In various spiritual books I read about some kind of veil of illusion and The Gateless Gate.
I heard this koan many times—had no idea what it meant—
until I felt like I was standing there—at The Gate.
You feel it in your bones—standing there with your entire being.
Something really powerful is going on—not even sure what—like burning from inside out with a wish for Truth.
It feels ready. This is the time.
I must cross. I must rip off this illusion.
What the illusion is, not even sure yet, just intellectually maybe, if you have read or heard about it before.
But there is a strong feeling, as if you are about to step and fall into an abyss—the abyss of the unknown.
What was before was thoroughly explored.
It may have been comfortable, good, great, happy, not so good,
disappointing, boring, painful—anything—but at least it’s familiar.
Fear comes, in some cases even terror.
It feels that death is here—the death of the old life.
The death of the illusion.
Hesitation comes.
Then the decision: turn back to the familiar or forward into the unknown?
The decision comes.
Ready, vigilant and alive, you are there—at the Gate.
Then comes the guide who had crossed before. She takes your hand or
slaps your face, depending on what you need, and guides you through the Gate.
You turn back, and see that there is no Gate, there is no crossing,
there is no you.
And there never was.
ARE YOU READY?
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