‘It is in the arena of personal relationships that the illusion of a
separate self clings most tenaciously and insidiously. Indeed, there is
nothing that derails more spiritual seekers than the grasping at and
attaching to personal relationships. The revelation of perfect unity
reveals the true impersonality of all relationships. The ego always
interprets “impersonal” as meaning cold, distant, and aloof. However,
“impersonal” simply means not personal, or void of a separate me and a
separate you. The mind cannot comprehend a relationship without separate
entities, much as a character in a dream cannot comprehend that all
other dream characters are simply manifestations of the same dreamer.
Yet when the dreamer awakens, he instantly comprehends that the entire
dream, and all the characters in it, were none other than projections of
his own self. In the dream there is the appearance of separate,
personal entities in relationship, but upon awakening, one comprehends
the impersonal (non-separate) Self that is the source of all
appearances.
To deeply inquire into the question “Who is another?”
can lead to the direct experience that the other is one’s own Self —
that in fact there is no other. However, I have seen that for most
seekers, even this direct experiential revelation is not enough to
transform the painfully personal ways they relate. To come to this
profound transformation requires a very deep investigation into the
implications inherent within the experiential revelation that there is
no other. It is in the daily living of these implications that most
seekers fail. Why? Because, fundamentally, most people want to remain
separate and in control. Simply put, most people want to keep dreaming
that they are special, unique, and separate, more than they want to wake
up to the perfect unity of an Unknown which leaves no room for any
separation from the whole.’
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